April 1, Brooklyn—BAM announced plans for the opening of a
satellite Manhattan branch, called MAM (Manhattan Academy of Music), to be
tentatively located on the Highline "UltraNorth"—west of Madison
Square Garden overlooking the scenic train yards between West 30th and 33rd
Finally, after 150 years, and apart from a handful of
off-site performances including the equestrian theater troupe Zingaro, BAM has
decided to export its elusive cultural cachet to the island to its west. Manhattan
dwellers can more easily access the cutting edge culture they've flocked across
the East River to see.
“We feel that with the adventurous programming that will be
presented by MAM that Brooklynites are ready to venture into Manhattan for an
evening at the theater, and will see that there are great restaurants throughout
Brooklyn’s neighbor to the west,” said BAM’s Executive Producer Joseph
Brooklyn/Queens residents can rest assured that they'll have
safe passage home—the MAMbus will conveniently depart from MAM after each
curtain, making eight designated stops, from LIC to Red Hook and hotspots between.
(Note: Red Hook riders will be charged a fee of $28 to cover the cost of gas and artisanal salted caramels.)
MAM will also be a short walk from Penn Station, one of the city's largest
transportation hubs, right behind BAM's nearby Atlantic Avenue nexus.
Although not yet unveiled to the public, rumor has it that
the slogan/jingle for the new venue will be David Bowie's "Suffragette City,"
specifically the lyric, "Wham, BAM, thank you MAM."
(P.S. APRIL FOOLS!)